Today is my 51st birthday.
It feels different from 50. Last year, turning 50 felt like a destination. It was a huge, round number, a milestone marked by celebrations, reflections on “half a century,” and a look back at the highlight reel.
But 51? This feels like the starting line.
The party’s over, the confetti has settled, and now the quiet, meaningful work of the next chapter begins. There’s a certain clarity that comes with 51. The pressure is off, and the focus shifts from “What have I achieved?” to “How do I want to live?”
As I reflect on this new beginning in my world (my “vulagam”), I wanted to share not just my gratitude, but the most powerful takeaways I’m carrying forward. These are the truths that feel more real to me today than ever before.
1. You Don’t Manage Time. You Manage Energy.
For the first 40-odd years of my life, I was obsessed with “time management.” I tried to cram more into every hour, to be more “productive.”
At 51, I realize this is a fool’s errand. We all get the same 24 hours. The real currency of a well-lived life isn’t time; it’s energy.
I’ve learned that a 2-hour-long meeting that drains me is far more “expensive” than a 4-hour creative session that excites me.
My takeaway for you: Stop counting your minutes. Start auditing your energy.
- Who gives you energy? Spend more time with them.
- What tasks drain your energy? Automate, delegate, or delete them.
- Where do you feel most alive? Go there more often.
Your energy is your most precious asset. Protect it fiercely and invest it wisely.
“I used to say ‘yes’ to every coffee meeting. Now, I ask myself if that conversation will be a ‘deposit’ or a ‘withdrawal’ from my energy bank for the day. It’s changed everything.”
2. “Legacy” Isn’t a Statue. It’s a Seed.
We often talk about “legacy” as this grand, finished thing we leave behind—a book, a business, a monument.
Turning 51 has taught me that legacy is the exact opposite. It’s not a static object. It’s a living, breathing, daily action.
Legacy isn’t what you build. It’s what you plant.
It’s the seed of advice you give a junior colleague. It’s the 10 minutes of truly undivided attention you give your family. It’s the kindness you show to a stranger. It’s the article you write on this blog, hoping it helps even one person.
You don’t build a legacy at the end of your life. You live it, one small, generous act at a time.
My takeaway for you: Don’t worry about the size of your statue. Focus on the quality of your seeds. What are you planting today that will grow long after you’re gone?
3. The “Highlight Reel” is a Lie. Embrace the “Rough Cut.”
Social media has made us all curators of our own “highlight reel.” We show the promotions, the vacations, the perfect family photos. By 50, you can have a pretty impressive reel.
But 51 has taught me to love the “rough cut.”
The real juice of life isn’t in the polished end-product; it’s in the messy, unedited, process. It’s the failed experiment. It’s the difficult conversation that leads to understanding. It’s the vulnerability of saying “I don’t know” or “I was wrong.”
My greatest moments of growth haven’t come from my successes. They’ve come from my stumbles.
My takeaway for you: Stop comparing your “rough cut” (your everyday reality) to someone else’s “highlight reel.” The messy parts are where you learn. The failures are where you build character. Embrace your own unedited, authentic, perfectly imperfect story.
My Wish for the Year Ahead
As I step into my 51st year, my only goal is to live with more intention. To invest my energy in what matters, to plant seeds every day, and to embrace the rough cut with an open heart.
Thank you for being part of my “vulagam,” for reading, and for sharing this journey with me.
And now, I’d love to pass the gift of reflection to you…
What’s one lesson, big or small, that is guiding you in your current chapter of life?
Please share it in the comments below.
